And just like that, we’re at the halfway point of the season. It’s been a wild one so far, with injuries so frequent we’re left to bid on teams’ practice squads just to fill our lineups.
And who would have thunk the offensively challenged MN Vikings would be the last undefeated team in the NFL?!
As for The Terrible Ten, things are a little more even keel. At the midway point, we’re split down the middle — the top five teams are all pretty excellent, and each can make a case for winning it all; the bottom five teams are pretty poopy and will be surprises if they advance through the playoffs.
This dichotomy was on full display in my matchup with Zach in Week Seven. Despite some nice tallies from Omar Cooper and Emanuel Wilson, my QB Farm Team was no match for ZaWood, losing 113.64 – 172.16. Afterward, Zach pointed out that my fantasy football skills weren’t the only area I was lacking when compared to him.
In one of the tighter matchups of the week, Science Walrus went toe-to-toe with Packer Hater. Brent got excellent play from his QBs (around 50 points between Maye and Caleb), but the rest of the team was pretty quiet. With big days from Bucky, Jeanty, and McBride, Alex was able to sneak by with the win, 122.16 – 113.46. Now sitting with a 2-5 record, Science Walrus has to wonder just where his little experiment went so wrong.
Another matchup that went down to the wire was Urban Achievers vs Living the Nightmare. Through the Sunday games, Redman was up by 20ish and looked to have the advantage on MNF with Pickens still to play. But then Barkley put up a quick batch of points for Johnnie and things looked kinda-sorta interesting a few minutes into the game! Unfortunately for The Nightmare, Saquon didn’t do much after that initial burst, leaving him short, 115.92 – 138.02. Sorry your dreams of victory were ruined, my friend. Now, just bring that sweet 2027 1st right over here, will you? Yup, that’s it…right heeeeeeeere.
What the bloody hell has happened to The Analrapists?! Remember when the Young-Coker stack was all the rage?! I’m sure Ted was hoping for a return to form this week, but the once-dominant stack netted only 6.8 combined points in Week Seven. That, coupled with down games from everyone in the lineup not named Javonte or Deshaun, led to a putrid loss to Growler Prowler, 75.14 – 114.42. So much for Ted doing the pitching anymore this season.
And last, Buzzy did the best he could with what he has, but it wasn’t close to enough against Skeletor and his Evil Empire, losing 71.38 – 124.54. The win came at the perfect time for Scotty, ending his two-game skid and keeping him in the mix with the other top teams. I think it goes without saying Skeletor also needed some release after being backed up for a couple weeks. Mmm, that sweet, sweet honeypot!
Best of luck in Week Eight, fellas!
Andy
