That’s our fantasy scores, grandpa. Sweet Jesus, that was brutal. The byes weren’t even the killers this week. The rash of injuries across the league certainly didn’t help matters, but even that can be written off as “Situation: Normal” for this time of the season. What happened to Josh Allen and the Bills? Joe Burrow … More 2021 Week Nine Recap

A belated Happy Halloween to you and yours. I should have mentioned it in the last newsletter, but the holiday kind of snuck up on me this year. Anyone have any epic costumes? I know Scotty of the Evil Empire went as Coach Beard from Ted Lasso (characters from that show and from Squid Game … More 2021 Week Eight Recap

Week Seven is historically a tough time for fantasy football managers, and this year was no different. Dallas, Buffalo, Jacksonville, Minnesota, Pittsburgh, and the LA Chargers — teams with numerous superstars this season — were all on bye, leaving everyone scrambling to fill the roster voids. While there were points to be found in fantasy … More 2021 Week Seven Recap

At first it was kind of funny, an unexpected loss to yours truly that could be laughed off and moved on from. Then it almost made you wince when you saw the losses piling up. Now it’s borderline sad. Poor Science Walrus — whose roster showcases the creme de la creme of the league, a … More 2021 Week Six Recap

Hmm. What to do, what to do? Should I leave Redman’s blurb until last, making him wait for it as long as possible? Should I just ghost him with something like “Redman won…moving right along, how about The Walrus’ huge win in Week Five?!”, thereby giving him short shrift? God, that’d be awesome. I can … More 2021 Week Five Recap

Sunday, October 3, 2021. A day every football fan marked on their calendar. Two giants of the game were set to square off, competitors who’ve known each other for decades, able to exploit weaknesses that others with less experience wouldn’t know about. A true clash of the titans. No regular-season game in recent memory has … More 2021 Week Four Recap

One month of football is in the books, and Redman is back to regale us with his updated power rankings. How have things changed in the past four weeks? Read on to see where you landed! 1. Josh’s Collection of Dildos That He Named: Thomas Jane, Ray Stevensen, and Jon Bernthal (Up 2 Spots) Give … More 2021 Power Rankings, Part Deux

I’m starting this week’s newsletter with a bit of a tangent. I recently succumbed to all the praise I’d heard about Apple TV’s hit show, Ted Lasso. I’m only a handful of episodes into the series, but fully understand — and agree with — the love that’s been heaped upon it. Maybe the easiest way … More 2021 Week Three Recap

If I had any class whatsoever, I’d just write a nice introduction to the weekly newsletter, run through the scores in a factual manner, wish you all good luck in Week Three, and not call special attention to my matchup. If I had any class. Yeah. Remember that cute little guest essay Redman wrote for … More 2021 Week Two Recap

I can’t speak for teams that actually have good players on them, but my Sleeper notifications on Sunday looked more like an infirmary roster than a highlight reel. Each time my phone beeped I thought I’d be seeing a big play, only to read the name of the latest player to bite the dust. Injuries … More 2021 Week One Recap