Oh, how a once-mighty league has fallen. Gone are the halcyon days of weekly podcasts by Rubberband Man and FF Walrus, or newsletters by our fearless leader, Dark Side Scotty. These days, Scotty’s overseas walking with elephants (I shit you not) while Brent and Alex are doing their best Married with Children imitation:
Which brings you all here for the next couple weeks, having to listen to the perennial TSN loser wrap up the 2025 season for the folks who still have something to play for. Talk about a downgrade.
And so, fellow nerds, I say…
…as we get down to the business of recapping the TSN semifinals.
Three-time reigning champ, Lamar’s Incredible Balls, jumped out to a massive lead against Rubberband Man, thanks to Puka’s 40.50 explosion on TNF. The huge deficit truly made it a David vs Goliath battle for Alex going into the weekend.
I’m guessing if you’d told Alex that both Treveyon AND Johnnie’s namesake would be out early in their Sunday night matchup, earning almost no points between them, it would be just the kind of miracle he felt he needed to overtake the champ. Sadly, Johnnie had too many weapons that could pick up the slack. Instead of Alex slaying the league giant with his mighty rubberband:
It all backfired:
Giving Lamar’s Incredible Balls the victory, 141.84 – 103.80, and sending him to the finals for the fourth (!!) year in a row. Not sure they come more confident than Johnnie as he preps for another ‘ship.
Not that the other side of the semifinal bracket is just gonna roll over for the champ. Both Jolly Rodgers and 2 Gibbs, 1 Higgs are perennial powerhouses, looking to end Johnnie’s run and etch their names upon the TSN trophy.
2 Gibbs, 1 Higgs also jumped out to an early lead on TNF, earning a cool 19.60 from JSN.
Unfortunately, while Jason had a solid day from most of his players, none of them were able to top the 19 points he started with. That’s not necessarily the death knell when you’re playing someone like, say, Team Pudpuller, but it likely won’t work against someone as stacked as Jolly Rodgers.
Annnnnnnnd…
Jolly Rodgers proved to be too much, having five of his eight starters score more than 20 points (with Chase Brown’s 30-burger leading the way), giving Chas the performance of the week in his 156.90 – 109.38 dismantling of 2 Gibbs, 1 Higgs as he asserted his dominance heading into the finals.
And there you have it. One more week of fantasy football, with Rubberband Man vs 2 Gibbs, 1 Higgs to see who recoups their league dues in the 3rd Place game, and Jolly Rodgers vs Lamar’s Incredible Balls in the Championship Game. Best of luck, fellas!
The Terrible Ten 