This was the week we celebrated the TE position, and in many cases that worked swimmingly for their respective teams. But, before we get to that, can we lament a trio of RBs that got bit by the injury bug? Judkins and Barkley left their games early, but seem to be ok enough that they won’t miss significant time. Everyone’s favorite rookie, Cam Skattebo, was not so lucky, lost for the season to a devastating ankle injury. Sweet Jesus, did that thing look bad.
Week to week, I have no expectation of winning. I’m chalking up 2025 to being the league’s chronicler and nothing else. But when a matchup starts to go the QB Farm Team’s way, I start to perk up. Such was the case when Packer Hater’s team underperformed, and my misfits excelled in some areas. Therefore, when I went into MNF only down 11ish with a coveted TE left to play, I was feeling good. TE Week, right?! Well, it appears Mr. Ertz missed the memo, scoring a piddly 3.60 and giving Packer Hater the (undeserved) win, 85.90 – 77.76. Gah! What a tease. 😭
Buzzystinger is another team that I expect to lose each and every week, and he didn’t disappoint in his matchup against Urban Achievers, who swatted him 162.22 – 96.36. In truth, it wasn’t a bad effort from Buzzy, who almost cracked 100 despite Judkins getting hurt and Hunt riding the pine. Unfortunately for Bryon, Redman was ON. When CMC ends up being your worst starter of the week, you know you’re crushing.
I swear to god, this next matchup will make you tear your damned hair out. Puff’s Punishers had four “starters” on bye this week, and looked to be fielding about half of a team until just prior to gametime. He also made the seemingly weird choice to start Mac Jones over Kirko Chains (goes to show I’m not infallible in my QB prognostication). The Analrapists, on the other hand, finally benched that bum Tua and tried the Red Rifle…only to have Tua go nuts on Ted’s bench. And that’s just how the day went for The Analrapists, playing a depleted team and still coming out on bottom, 96.96 – 127.08. Keep working at it, Ted. Soon you’ll be down here with meeeeeeeee.
Growler Prowler got some help from his opponent this week when Science Walrus left Drake London in his lineup (oy), not that it ultimately mattered. Tucker Kraft *definitely* came to play on SNF, putting up TE1 numbers to go along with a massive game from James Cook, drowning Science Walrus, 143.20 – 99.58, leaving Brent begging for mercy by the time it was all over. Scott could only sneer in disgust and send him on his way.
As impressive as James Cook looked in Week Eight, JT of the Evil Empire was even better, putting up 36.40 all by hisownself. One would have thought ZaWood’s Bijan Robinson would do as good or even better against the lowly Miami Dolphins defense. But no. Somehow, some way, Bijan only put up 4.3 points. That, coupled with the Skattebo injury and other lackluster play, left ZaWood a little short against Evil Empire, 112.98 – 122.58, putting Scotty back in first place. As if that wasn’t enough, ole Skeletor went a step further in demoralizing his main competition this season.
Best of luck in Week Nine, fellas!
Andy
The Terrible Ten 