For a game that seems pretty straightforward — a bunch of guys run/pass/catch the football and you get points for their efforts — it’s crazy how many wrinkles get thrown our way. I just wrapped up my 17th season of fantasy football, and it seems like I see something new every year. I’m not talking about the usual shenanigans, like player injuries or bye weeks that leave it hard to fill your roster. How about Andrew Luck retiring out of nowhere? Or the damned Metrodome roof collapsing on the eve of a game? Or a Covid-plagued season with entire games being canceled from week to week?
Yet nothing could prepare me for what happened on MNF during Week 17, when Damar Hamlin suffered cardiac arrest both mid-game and at the hospital after being ambulanced from the stadium. Suddenly the league and its legion of fans were in unprecedented territory, and not in a good way.
Thankfully, as of this writing, Hamlin is back in Buffalo after spending a week in intensive care in Cincinnati. The NFL called the game between the Bills and Bengals a no-contest. Football fans came forward in a big way, donating millions of dollars to Hamlin’s charity. And most importantly, Hamlin is alive and recovering in a Buffalo hospital.
And so, I’m left in the unenviable position of ratcheting down my Dangerfield-like sense of humor and closing out the Terrible Ten’s fourth season on a somber note. In the case of Urban Achievers vs Puff’s Punishers, it’s easy to be subdued. For the second year in a row, the Punishers finished the regular season as the Number One seed, and for the second year in a row Josh finished in fourth place, far away from a championship and failing to win any money. Kudos to Urban Achievers for coming in third place during an injury-plagued season and winning back his $50 entry fee. As a huge proponent of moral victories, I’m sure Redman was thrilled.
Unfortunately for Packer Hater and Evil Empire, their Super Bowl matchup was close enough as to be affected by the no-contest on MNF. What could have been a difficult situation for your humble commish was made infinitely easier when Alex and Scott decided to share the pot and the trophy as co-champions, netting them each $225 and six months of trophy-stroking. Thanks for coming together to make a bad situation work out, fellas.
And that’s that. A little anti-climactic, but in the grand scheme of things, not nearly as important as good news on the Hamlin front.
Some housekeeping items before some of you go into hibernation:
1. If anyone wants to duck out of the league, now’s the time to embark on your walk of shame, both so I have months and months to mercilessly mock you AND so I can find some fresh meat.
2. Please watch the chat the next few weeks. I’ll be rolling out polls to vote on numerous changes that have been proposed during the course of the season. I also want to open some dialogue on tiebreakers and other scenarios that we never fully fleshed out during our inaugural season. While none of it is major, league-altering stuff, I’d still like to have everyone vote on the future of the league.
3. Rookie draft will be in May. I’ll do my best to dodge the fishing opener again. If anyone has anything going on that month, let me know as we get closer and we’ll shuffle things around accordingly.
I think that’s it for now. Thanks again for another wonderful season. It’s a pleasure playing this dumb game with you guys — the gameday chat, the trades, the newsletters, the shit-talking and rivalries, all of it. Hope you all have a great off-season, and hope to see you checking in on the chat.
Andy
The Terrible Ten 