I’m starting this week’s newsletter with a bit of a tangent. I recently succumbed to all the praise I’d heard about Apple TV’s hit show, Ted Lasso. I’m only a handful of episodes into the series, but fully understand — and agree with — the love that’s been heaped upon it. Maybe the easiest way to describe it is by calling it “Major League Lite,” but it’s so much more than that. The characters are perfectly cast, the humor is laugh-out-loud funny, the sly one-liners and pop-culture references would give even the encyclopedic Redman a run for his money, and maybe most importantly during these heavy times, it has a ton of heart. Its 30-minute episodes are the perfect shot in the arm at the end of your day. If you’re looking for something new to watch, I heartily recommend it. And, despite its sports angle, your significant others may enjoy it as well; as much as I enjoy the show, my wife likes it even more.
Back to The Terrible Ten, let’s start with the preseason favorite to win the trophy, the team to beat, the group of players so heads and tails abov—…wait, what? Brent lost for the second week in row, 134.72 – 122.54, to Growler Prowler?! And both CMC and AJ Brown were hurt with hammy injuries?!?! Phew. Not a great start to the season for The Walrus. As for Scott, he not only improved to 2-1, but also used his considerable brewmaster skills to create an oh-so-sweet vintage for his drinking pleasure.
While we’re talking about Scotts, let’s address the Evil Empire’s matchup with Redman’s Urban Achievers, shall we? Mr. Osterloh didn’t exhibit the heart of a champion this week, putting up the second lowest score on the board. As concerning as the performance was to the Empire, I’m not sure it would have made a difference given how good the Urban Achievers looked. On top of Red’s rascally rookies, his Herbert-Williams stack is likely second only to Stafford-Kupp at the moment. Put it all together and Cody death-starred the Evil Empire, 132.70 – 91.72, putting us all on notice that…
Buzzystinger has proven to be a pest for numerous teams to this point, but if anyone in this league can deal with pain in the ass, it’s The Analrapists. Ted couldn’t have chosen much better with his selections this week, even succeeding with long-shot Jacoby Brissett en route to his 124.92 – 99.82 victory over Bryon. Both teams are now 2-1, but after looking like a machine the first couple weeks, Ted definitely transformed Buzzy into a much weaker version of himself.
Buzzy’s demise in Week Three means we’re down to only two undefeated teams in the league. I could bluster and flagellate myself over my FF prowess, but really, two things happened here: 1) Cooper Kupp is really good, and my tier-two RBs played out of their minds, and 2) Alex’s team couldn’t capitalize on poor play by Fields (3.96), Hockenson (2.00), and Williams (2.20). The end result was a 114.96 – 71.26 victory for 2 ina KHunt, 1 ina Hooper, but let’s face it: from the lowliest of the low to the highest office in the land, everyone knows this about me:
Quite the opposite of Puff’s Punishers, who’s also 3-0 but very much the real deal after crushing ZaWood 133.96 – 127.58. Josh’s offense is firing on all cylinders, earning the top Points For total in the league and averaging almost 15 points more per game than the next closest competitor. As for Zach, you hate to see what’s happening to him. Dude’s the fourth highest scorer in the league, but is stuck at 0-3 after getting waaaaaaay more points scored against him than anyone else. Poor bastard. Last I heard, he was hard at work trying to find a way out of his predickament.
Best of luck in Week Four, fellas!
Andy
The Terrible Ten 