What better time to review The Terrible Ten Rookie Draft than, um, almost four months after the fact!? LET’S GO!!!
My apologies for the delay. It proved to be a long summer. We sold our house (had 20+ showings in the first 24 hours, and sold it the day after we listed it) and moved to a bigger house a couple miles down the road. June was spent packing up the original house; July was spent unpacking everything in the new house. Mix in a three-week MS flare in late July/early August, the new house’s basement flooding not once but twice in the first two weeks we lived there, and my stepson totaling my car 48 hours after getting his driver’s license, and yeah, it’s been a summer.
So, despite it being well after the fact and almost no one likely caring at this point, I’m doing this newsletter for two reasons: first, to placate Redman, whom I’ve told over and over that I’d write a draft report card; second, to get my mind and fingers ready for the nonstop hilarity of my weekly newsletters. And so, without further ado, here is The Terrible Ten’s Draft Summary for 2021:
Urban Achievers
1.01 — Trevor Lawrence, QB (JAX)
1.03 — Kyle Pitts, TE (ATL)
1.05 — Najee Harris, RB (PIT)
1.07 — Ja’marr Chase, WR (CIN)
1.08 — Travis Etienne, RB (JAX)
1.09 — Javonte Williams, RB (DEN)
2.01 — Jaylen Waddle, WR (MIA)
2.03 — Rondale Moore, WR (ARI)
2.05 — Rashod Bateman, WR (BAL)
3.01 — Amon-Ra St. Brown, WR (DET)
4.08 — Javian Hawkins, RB (ATL)
4.10 — Jaret Patterson, RB (WAS)
Six of the first ten picks. Twelve picks in total, accounting for 30% of the draft. I still shake my head when I see those numbers.
After a poor inaugural season followed by a 1-12 record last year, Redman sold his veteran assets and made a play for the future…and what a draft it was. On paper, I’m not sure he could have chosen a better year to sell out for a new team, and he certainly couldn’t have asked for the picks to fall any better for him: the most highly touted QB prospect in years; the top three RBs in the draft; arguably four of the top five WRs this class; and a TE that had owners in the NFL *and* fantasy leagues frothing at the mouth. This on top of drafting CEH (read: NOT Jonathan Taylor) and Justin Herbert last year, and Redman should be a tough beat down the road. I’m not convinced he’ll make a run this year – I have to assume it’ll take some time for the rookies to get acclimated and excel, and he’s already had injuries with Etienne and Bateman – but I think it’s fair to say he’ll be a team to beat sooner rather than later. Get those ‘ships now, boys, before this team steamrolls us all.
Draft Grade: A+
[That enough knob-polishing, Red? No? OK, I’ll get back in position.]
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Puffs’s Punishers
2.02 – Devonta Smith, WR (PHI)
3.02 – Kyle Trask, QB (TB)
4.02 – Kylin Hill, RB (GB)
These three picks are the very definition of “meh” – a WR that won the Heisman, but is buried on a mediocre Eagles team; a backup QB; and a third-string RB – but the real news on draft day was when Pearce traded away 1.02 for Matthew Stafford and Jalen Reagor (another Eagles WR who was barely in the top 100 passcatchers last season). It was a bizarre move at the time – The Punishers were the second worst team, and are already saddled with another aging QB in Big Ben. Why not use the pick to take one of the other young QBs in the draft and play for the future?!
[The league’s reaction to Pearce’s draft-day trade.]
The move doesn’t look so bad months later, after The Punishers secured Dalvin Cook and Robert Woods. Pearce has gone all-in and hopes to get back to the same level he was at during the league’s inaugural season, when he finished 10-3 in the regular season and 3rd overall through the playoffs. That being said, Cook and Woods weren’t on the radar at draft time, so I’m still left to wonder…
Draft Grade: D+
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Buzzystinger
3.03 – Pat Freiermuth, TE (PIT)
3.07 – D’Wayne Eskridge, WR (SEA)
4.03 – Anthony Schwarz, WR (CLE)
4.09 – Ihmir Smith-Marsette, WR (MIN)
When you only have picks in the 3rd and 4throunds, there’s not much to write about. I think Freiermuth at 3.03 has the potential to be a helluva value pick, but let’s face it: the others are dart throws.
What *wasn’t* a dart throw was Derrick Henry, whom Buzzy picked up pre-draft for his 1st and 2nd rounders (a pretty sweet deal for the top RB in the league last year). While Buzzy hasn’t made the playoffs in our first two years of existence, he has a pretty solid lineup coming into the 2021 season. Will this be the first time we feel his, ahem, sting?
[Ok, well, definitely not in midseason form on that one.]
Draft Grade: C-
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PackerHater84
1.02 – Trey Lance, QB (SF)
3.08 – Nico Collins, WR (HOU)
3.09 – Rhamondre Stevenson, RB (NE)
4.04 – Josh Palmer, WR (LAC)
First things first, can we all agree Alex deserves an award for even being at the draft? I mean, he was in the hospital for the delivery of his daughter, and still found a way to make it work. That took some seeds (I once drafted on my anniversary, and I thought it’d be my last). Thanks for making The Terrible Ten your highest priority!
As for what he did with his draft picks, I’ve struggled to know how to grade him. Alex made a big draft-day trade, moving up to 1.02 and selecting Trey Lance in exchange for 1.04, 2.04, and 3.04. It was a pretty big price to pay to move up two spots, especially when there’s a good chance Lance would have been there at 1.04 anyway. Still, you gotta give Alex props for grabbing the guy he wanted if he felt like he was gonna miss out.
Up above I said it’s pretty much a dart throw when you’re dealing with 3rd and 4th round picks, but in this case, it’s looking like Alex’s aim might have been true. I don’t think anyone had more buzz in the preseason than Rhamondre Stevenson, who had the following line:
30 carries, 216 yards (equating to an impressive 7.2 YPC), 5 rushing TDs.
I know, I know, it’s preseason, but it’s still an impressive line AND the Patriots dumped both Sony Michel and Cam “TD Vulture” Newton, making it a little easier for Stevenson to hit the field this year.
Alex’s 4th round pick also beat out other players to take over WR3 on a Chargers offense that airs it out under Herbert, so there’s also the possibility of a bullseye there.
Overall, a pretty well executed draft for a dude drafting from a hospital room. I likely would have shat all over your picks if I’d written this sooner, but with what we know now?
Draft Grade: B
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ZaWood
2.08 – Elijah Moore, WR (NYJ)
3.05 – Amari Rodgers, WR (GB)
4.05 – Elijah Mitchell, RB (SF)
Zach’s big move came pre-draft, as he sold off some picks in exchange for Kirk Cousins, Noah Fant, and future picks from Redman. Not a bad move, as it allowed ZaWood to add depth to areas that were question marks coming into the year, as well as gave him more prospects in the future. But how did Zach do in the actual draft?
Well…
Right now it’s hard to say. Amari Rodgers had a decent preseason with plenty of catches, but I assume the addition of Cobb will keep him buried on the Packers’ bench for now. Elijah Moore is intriguing, but wasn’t available in the preseason that I saw. And Mitchell is buried on a team that employs a 372-person RB committee. So…?
Draft Grade: C
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And that completes Part 1 of the 2021 Rookie Draft Report Card. Come back in another four months to read the rest of my brilliant opinions on your lousy teams. Until then…
The Terrible Ten 