More games being moved/canceled due to coronavirus. Additional injuries to big-name players. Atlanta cleaning house at the highest levels (and intimating that Matt Ryan and Julio Jones might be on the way out too). Leveon Bell being outright cut. Adam Gase still having a job?! I ask you…
It’s for this reason I’m proud of my team for bringing you a little stability during this tumultuous time. You can’t count on much these days, but Two Christians, One Kupp is always good for a win. This week’s victim was Bryon, who lost a yawner 116.60 – 81.30. With an early injury to Diontae and my playing it safe with Josh Allen (i.e. being a huge puss), I was ripe for the picking. Unfortunately, Buzzy’s team couldn’t get out of its own way.
It looked like Brent’s matchup with Redman was going to be another laugher for the Underachievers. Down by a big margin, Justin Herbert’s 27.36 on MNF gave Cody a slim chance going into Tuesday’s contest. And what do you know, Derrick Henry just about got him there with 18.80. But, with the game out of hand late in the 4th, Tennessee gave the star RB a breather, allowing the ScienceWalrus to sneak through 117.36 – 113.14. Better luck next time, Red.
Next up we have the always entertaining Battle of the Scotts, in which Osterloh’s Evil Empire drained Palmquist’s Growler Prowler 123.14 – 100.80. The win, which kept Skeletor nipping at my heels in the standings, was so exciting for Scotty that he celebrated with, uh…well…let’s just give him some alone time, ok fellas?
Who says you need two quarterbacks to win in this league?! Certainly not Ted, who has put together back-to-back wins, moving him above .500 and catapulting him into the playoff hunt. As for Josh, who’s now hovering just above Redman at 1-4, he seems to have forgotten that his namesake is usually the one who *gives* the beatdowns.
Rounding out the week, Alex withstood a late push by Keenan Allen and Alvin Kamara to outlast ZaWood 129.34 – 122.36. After the game I heard some grumbling that The Wiz may have used a little hocus-pocus to cause Allen’s early injury and to make the Saints keep using Murray in the run game. I have no proof one way or the other, but gents, if I’ve said it once I’ve said it a hundred times when playing Alex:
Best of luck in Week Six, fellas!
Andy
The Terrible Ten 